it's about time...

It's been a full month...ok a lil more than...that since my last entry. I've been busy...and lazy. But it's really about time for an update...so here goes...

SICK -
Last week was a lil rough...I was down with a bad bout of stomach virus...really down. It was nearly as bad as the last time I had it...when I was in Cambodia. This time, I finally proved that I'm no longer allergic to PANADOL! Thank God...it's really a blessing to have some RELIEF and not try to WAIT for a fever or a headache or some really bad flu-ache to go away. I'm FULLY recovered now...lost a lil weight...which is a GOOD thing. *hee* I kinda lost my appetitie...it's not back yet and I don't really want it back. Do pray that I won't fall sick so often...gotta be physically healthy and strong! (gotta start exercising soon!)

TEACH -
Going back to teaching reminds me of that love-hate relationship I used to have with this job...and my students. Teaching invigorates me...really brings my energy level high...and I enjoy talking, and teaching and interacting with the kids...and knowing that they are learning...BUT at the same time...teaching drains me...sucks me dry...makes me really discouraged when they misbehave and don't get what I'm trying to do...sometimes, it really makes me question the whole point of educating them. This job throws me into a whole range of thoughts and emotions...
As much as I love interacting with them and getting to know them, helping them learn...deep down inside me, there's this urge to want to give to them something that's of true eternal value. I keep thinking about how lost I felt when I was their age...and how meaningless life felt. And these days, when I look at them...when I learn about their inner struggles...their questions, their values, their life philosphy...I can't help feeling frustrated...cos I wish so much for them to find what I've found...but I don't seem to know how to help them. I feel as if my hands are tied... Times like these, I just turn to Him and cry out to Him...what do I do, LORD? how?
MY HOD once asked me why can't I be a missionary where I am, as a teacher?...I've heard of teachers who are effective as witnesses in their schools...and I ask myself the same (well, not exactly the same) question...can't I stay a teacher in my home country and be His light and testimony? Can't that be my ministry where I serve Him? Well, when I teach, I'm driven by the motivation to do my best to teach...to help them learn, improve...yes, do well in their examinations...impart the right values...and that is my job. I'm often overwhelmed by just trying to do that one thing...to teach them (grammar, vocabulary, summary, comprehension, algebra, trigonometry...). My conclusion is that this job really demands much of me...and in those three years, I haven't really had that much opportunities to build those close relationships with my students to establish that platform to share...it's very much touch and go. At the same time, there's this desire inside me...to want to be able to serve Him wholeheartedly...not here, but in Thailand. And this, I believe, is what He's guiding me towards...
And no, I'm not escaping...not making excuses for what I'm NOT doing/NOT able to do while I'm teaching here... I'm simply obeying what I believe He has been calling me to do...since that first trip to Thailand in 1999.
Well, I'll be teaching till the mid-yr exams...then it'll be preparation to leave for Thailand! (can't wait!)

OMF application -

1) Visa Application

OMF is currently submitting my application to the Thailand side and they will be applying for my visa (missionary visa). This process takes about 4 to 5 months and this really requires prayer cos they're quite strict about granting missionary visas.

2) Orientation Course at OMF (13 July - 4 Aug)

I'm most likely to be going on this OC...will be leaving for Thailand for 2 years before National Day!

3) Current Status

MY official status with OMF is OMF Missionary Designate. This means I can send out my own newsletter with the OMF logo. (gotta do that soon!)

4) Clearances

The 4 clearances are Field (Thailand side), Medical, Home & Support. I've cleared the Field side cos I've met with the Thailand director and I've been granted a welcome in principle pending the other clearances. Medical side looks favourable...still waiting for my results from the psychological assessment. I've met with the Home Council for an interview and that went pretty ok. The last clearance is the support clearance. Pray for the meeting between OMF side and my church mission board.

Thank you all for praying...! :)